Notes on Reading the Gospels
Mark
What stands out:
Fast-paced action. Breathless, exuberant witness. Jesus' delivery: plain speech, voice of authority. I appreciate Mark's exuberant testimony which gives us a sense of how astounding was the fresh and unequivocal authority of Jesus' teaching, and I delight in how excitedly Mark describes the apparent fast-paced action of all that Jesus did. I too feel the awesome new-life-giving power of all that Christ does, and the uniqueness of His authority. I also like how emotionally the drama is depicted; even though (or maybe because) much of the writing seems rough-hewn, I find myself easily in the scene: I feel the human emotions of being confronted by the status-quo-disrupting, awesome-and-terrifying, saving grace of my Lord and Savior.
Challenges to discipleship:
One of my favorite Gospel stories is the one of the woman who had been bleeding for twelve years (Mark 5:25-34). I am profoundly grateful for her pro-active faith which led her to courageous initiative. Her reaching out to touch the hem of Christ's cloak, despite the fact that in her society women were not to touch men, and the sick or "unclean" were not to "defile" the "clean", encourages me to reach out to Christ in faith in any and every circumstance. Jesus rewards her for her faith-filled-action; He heals her. This is empowering for me as well. I believe Christ calls each of us not only through the faith-community, but also through our very personal need of Him. Sometimes we have to reach out, sometimes even being the first to challenge institutionalized societal mores or customs, crossing the man-made boundaries that might leave us bleeding, out-cast, or captive.
Matthew
What stands out:
If someone were to tell me I will be stranded on a desert-isle for the remainder of my life and I can take only one book, I would choose the Bible. And were they to say, you can only take part of the Bible, I would say "give me the Gospels and the Psalms.". Were they to say no, you can take only one writing, I would likely choose one of the Gospels, but it would not be Matthew! Of all the Gospels I find this the "driest.". The action-packed drama of Mark sweeps me off my feet; the canticles and lyrical writing of Luke, particularly the revelation of the Healer's heart, appeals to my soul; my spirit feeds on the deep theology of John; but Matthew requires of me a greater effort to attend, to "seek and find". This is apropos inasmuch as this is his main theme: the Kingdom of God is at hand, and we are to seek it and find it and most of all, to do it! I also find a kind of harshness or asceticism in Matthew that seems more pronounced that any similar teaching in the other Gospels. In this context, Matthew 11:28-30 is all the more sweet and nourishing: "Come to me all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart; and you shall find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My load is light."
Challenges to discipleship:
I find it remarkable that while Matthew addresses an audience of faith-instructed, tradition-holding, Jewish Christians, he is the most critical of the Jewish leaders of his time. I find myself thinking were Matthew to write today, he would write similarly to us, particularly the western-culture-enmeshed Christians and our Church leaders. I don't hear Jesus' chastisements as against the Jewish religion, but rather against any instance of self-righteousness, against using any gift from God as an excuse to turn away from serving or sharing with our neighbor (and our "enemy.") Matthew proclaims the Kingdom of God is at hand, but it is an upside-down Kingdom, where the first shall be last and the last shall be first, where all the lost and lacking are happy (see the Beatitudes) because they are fed and clothed by the King Himself, Who lays down His own life for them while they are yet tardy workers and sickly sinners. For me, chapter 16, verses 24-27 convey the main message of Matthew; essentially to enter this Kingdom of Life, one must die to self; i.e. to be a disciple of Christ, one must follow Him to and through the Cross.
Luke (and Acts)
What stands out:
The Holy Spirit coming to us and guiding us. God is generous. Journeys. Meals. Prayer. Healing. Intimacy. Luke shows Christ's concern for the lowly: the sick, the poor, women, children, out-casts.
Four of my favorite passages in Luke are 1) Luke 2:1-20, especially the part about the angels appearing to the shepherds; 2) Luke 10:38-42, regarding Mary and Martha; 3) Luke 15:11-32, the parable of "the prodigal son;" and 4) Luke 24:13-35, the account of those on the road to Emmaus. The 1st is a good example of how Luke shows God's generosity to the lowest of society, the shepherds, giving them the glorious good news of the Savior's birth. The 2nd teaches us that Jesus wants personal intimacy with each of us. The 3rd makes marvelous use of all these themes, with a dramatic revelation of the Father's astounding generosity and amazing, unconditional love. The 4th is a consummate example of the themes of journey, and revelation of the Lord and intimacy with Him through breaking of the bread and prayer, as well as the healing of restoration of community through faith-sharing.
Challenges to discipleship:
Luke shows us a compassionate and forgiving Savior. At the same time we are called to radical discipleship to Christ. We are challenged to give up all we have and all we are (Luke 12 and 14:25-35). What stands out to me in the book of Acts is the power of the Holy Spirit at work in those who truly believed (as in trusted and lived) on the Lord Jesus Christ with their whole heart, mind, and body. The stories that demonstrate this for me are: Acts Chapter 2 regarding the day of Pentecost;
Chapter 4: 32-37 regarding the sharing of everything among the believers; Chapter 7: 55-60 Stephen's ability to forgive while being stoned; Chapter 9: 1-19 Saul's conversion and Ananias' faith in the face of danger and the naturally-impossible; Chapter 10 Cornelius' conversion and Peter's further conversion through the initiative of the Holy Spirit; Paul's passionate perseverance in faith through many trials to the very end. All of these stories show me that the Holy Spirit wants to do radical things, and will move where-ever God wills, even when we are stuck in human conceptions about what should be. In all these stories, it is the Holy Spirit that initiates. The Lord uses those who respond by yielding to the Spirit.
This to me is amazing, glorious, and reassuring. My own experience of this world is that human systems tend to become corrupt, eventually perpetrating some form of injustice even if that wasn't the original intent of the founders or maintainers of the system. I also experience many individuals as bullies or tending to operate out of a profoundly self-centered mentality. I.e. God didn't give me any form of worldly armor. I identify with the little ones who are forgotten or run over in many situations, while others fight for something "big" but "of this world.". I daily experience the vulnerability of being a human creature, wholly dependent upon my Creator for any good thing.
The accounts in Acts show me that God is bigger and God is more powerful than anyone or anything of this world, even if He chooses not to take up the "fight" according to the world's rules of engagement. The Lord's ways are completely Other than human ways; and yet, He invites us to enter into His Life and to co-operate with His Will. To accept this invitation to radical discipleship, we must completely trust the Lord with our entire life; we must accept suffering; we must seek, find, and accept the Life that is ours in Jesus Christ by way of the Cross. And even that we can't do, unless we accept the Holy Spirit as the One "in whom we live and move and have our being.".
John
What stands out:
No matter how many times I read the Gospel of John, I am struck by the beauty and majesty of the opening profession of faith (John 1:1-18), "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God...". This prologue alone would be enough for me to meditate and feed upon for many a year. Everything in John's account meets me as awesomely profound and majestic, but at the very same time draws me to want and receive deeper intimacy with my Lord, Jesus Christ.
Challenges to discipleship:
The thing that strikes me about the Gospel of John is that over and over again in so many ways, the question is asked "who is Jesus" and we receive the answer, from Jesus Himself, or from witnesses: He is Lord, He is the Word, He is the Christ, He is God. However, with this most recent reading, I am noticing that every time Jesus tells us Who He is, we also learn something of who we are. If Jesus is the Word, I must be the one who hears (and obeys). If Jesus is the Light, I must be the one who sees (and acts). If Jesus is the Truth, I must assent to faith in Him. If Jesus is the Good Shepherd, I must follow Him with complete trust and dependence upon His provision and guidance. If Jesus is the Vine, I, as a branch, must bear fruit -- His fruit, not mine, not something I conjure up, but whatever He gives me to bear. If Jesus is the Messiah, the Lamb of God, I must find my life in Him, accept His salvation in the way He gives it, which is to die with Him and abide in Him through death and resurrection. If Jesus is my Creator and Lord, I must completely yield to Him, gratefully worshipping Him and yielding to His "finishing and perfecting" me in faith.
Personal Note
At the time I am writing this, I have received the devastating blow of losing my ministry-position at the place where I am employed. Due to the need for the institution to down-size, my role and my wages have been reduced to stipend-per-select-work, and no support for all the supporting work that makes the primary work do-able, at least in any excellent way. This is a catastrophic reduction in livelihood for me. I feel betrayed by the people of this organization. I am having a hard time discerning how the Lord wants me to respond. Does He want me here, to persevere in the face of chaos and apathy? Or is this a blatant call to go elsewhere? Does He want me to step away from everything and accept a completely new path? I'm trying to let the Holy Spirit speak to me through the reading of The Word and my reflection upon it. Even while I make the observations I have (above), I am not yet able to see how they practically apply to my life right now. My heart is in agony because I don't know how to proceed.
During the meditations on the Stations of the Cross, I find it easy to identify with the passages about "I look about me and there is no-one to lend me aid..."
The only thing I can perceive right now is that maybe the Lord doesn't want to allow anyone else to help me because He wants to be my Sole Friend and Savior in every detail. (Sole and Soul. Yes, I know.). I think this kind of thinking is potentially dangerous. I dare not assume I am the author or determiner of how God wants to care for me. God can use others or not. God can vary how He works. God is not bound by anything, except Himself; He is Love; everything He does is Love. I still believe completely in God, Who He Is, and that He Is With me. I just don't know any of the details right now. And that gives me anxiety.
Lord, Holy Spirit, please fill my heart with You. I don't even ask for any particular thing or feeling or perception or thought or direction; just fill me with You. Let "just" You be enough for me.
The Lord giveth; the Lord taketh away; blessed be the Name of the Lord.
Amen.
Mark
What stands out:
Fast-paced action. Breathless, exuberant witness. Jesus' delivery: plain speech, voice of authority. I appreciate Mark's exuberant testimony which gives us a sense of how astounding was the fresh and unequivocal authority of Jesus' teaching, and I delight in how excitedly Mark describes the apparent fast-paced action of all that Jesus did. I too feel the awesome new-life-giving power of all that Christ does, and the uniqueness of His authority. I also like how emotionally the drama is depicted; even though (or maybe because) much of the writing seems rough-hewn, I find myself easily in the scene: I feel the human emotions of being confronted by the status-quo-disrupting, awesome-and-terrifying, saving grace of my Lord and Savior.
Challenges to discipleship:
One of my favorite Gospel stories is the one of the woman who had been bleeding for twelve years (Mark 5:25-34). I am profoundly grateful for her pro-active faith which led her to courageous initiative. Her reaching out to touch the hem of Christ's cloak, despite the fact that in her society women were not to touch men, and the sick or "unclean" were not to "defile" the "clean", encourages me to reach out to Christ in faith in any and every circumstance. Jesus rewards her for her faith-filled-action; He heals her. This is empowering for me as well. I believe Christ calls each of us not only through the faith-community, but also through our very personal need of Him. Sometimes we have to reach out, sometimes even being the first to challenge institutionalized societal mores or customs, crossing the man-made boundaries that might leave us bleeding, out-cast, or captive.
Matthew
What stands out:
If someone were to tell me I will be stranded on a desert-isle for the remainder of my life and I can take only one book, I would choose the Bible. And were they to say, you can only take part of the Bible, I would say "give me the Gospels and the Psalms.". Were they to say no, you can take only one writing, I would likely choose one of the Gospels, but it would not be Matthew! Of all the Gospels I find this the "driest.". The action-packed drama of Mark sweeps me off my feet; the canticles and lyrical writing of Luke, particularly the revelation of the Healer's heart, appeals to my soul; my spirit feeds on the deep theology of John; but Matthew requires of me a greater effort to attend, to "seek and find". This is apropos inasmuch as this is his main theme: the Kingdom of God is at hand, and we are to seek it and find it and most of all, to do it! I also find a kind of harshness or asceticism in Matthew that seems more pronounced that any similar teaching in the other Gospels. In this context, Matthew 11:28-30 is all the more sweet and nourishing: "Come to me all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart; and you shall find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My load is light."
Challenges to discipleship:
I find it remarkable that while Matthew addresses an audience of faith-instructed, tradition-holding, Jewish Christians, he is the most critical of the Jewish leaders of his time. I find myself thinking were Matthew to write today, he would write similarly to us, particularly the western-culture-enmeshed Christians and our Church leaders. I don't hear Jesus' chastisements as against the Jewish religion, but rather against any instance of self-righteousness, against using any gift from God as an excuse to turn away from serving or sharing with our neighbor (and our "enemy.") Matthew proclaims the Kingdom of God is at hand, but it is an upside-down Kingdom, where the first shall be last and the last shall be first, where all the lost and lacking are happy (see the Beatitudes) because they are fed and clothed by the King Himself, Who lays down His own life for them while they are yet tardy workers and sickly sinners. For me, chapter 16, verses 24-27 convey the main message of Matthew; essentially to enter this Kingdom of Life, one must die to self; i.e. to be a disciple of Christ, one must follow Him to and through the Cross.
Luke (and Acts)
What stands out:
The Holy Spirit coming to us and guiding us. God is generous. Journeys. Meals. Prayer. Healing. Intimacy. Luke shows Christ's concern for the lowly: the sick, the poor, women, children, out-casts.
Four of my favorite passages in Luke are 1) Luke 2:1-20, especially the part about the angels appearing to the shepherds; 2) Luke 10:38-42, regarding Mary and Martha; 3) Luke 15:11-32, the parable of "the prodigal son;" and 4) Luke 24:13-35, the account of those on the road to Emmaus. The 1st is a good example of how Luke shows God's generosity to the lowest of society, the shepherds, giving them the glorious good news of the Savior's birth. The 2nd teaches us that Jesus wants personal intimacy with each of us. The 3rd makes marvelous use of all these themes, with a dramatic revelation of the Father's astounding generosity and amazing, unconditional love. The 4th is a consummate example of the themes of journey, and revelation of the Lord and intimacy with Him through breaking of the bread and prayer, as well as the healing of restoration of community through faith-sharing.
Challenges to discipleship:
Luke shows us a compassionate and forgiving Savior. At the same time we are called to radical discipleship to Christ. We are challenged to give up all we have and all we are (Luke 12 and 14:25-35). What stands out to me in the book of Acts is the power of the Holy Spirit at work in those who truly believed (as in trusted and lived) on the Lord Jesus Christ with their whole heart, mind, and body. The stories that demonstrate this for me are: Acts Chapter 2 regarding the day of Pentecost;
Chapter 4: 32-37 regarding the sharing of everything among the believers; Chapter 7: 55-60 Stephen's ability to forgive while being stoned; Chapter 9: 1-19 Saul's conversion and Ananias' faith in the face of danger and the naturally-impossible; Chapter 10 Cornelius' conversion and Peter's further conversion through the initiative of the Holy Spirit; Paul's passionate perseverance in faith through many trials to the very end. All of these stories show me that the Holy Spirit wants to do radical things, and will move where-ever God wills, even when we are stuck in human conceptions about what should be. In all these stories, it is the Holy Spirit that initiates. The Lord uses those who respond by yielding to the Spirit.
This to me is amazing, glorious, and reassuring. My own experience of this world is that human systems tend to become corrupt, eventually perpetrating some form of injustice even if that wasn't the original intent of the founders or maintainers of the system. I also experience many individuals as bullies or tending to operate out of a profoundly self-centered mentality. I.e. God didn't give me any form of worldly armor. I identify with the little ones who are forgotten or run over in many situations, while others fight for something "big" but "of this world.". I daily experience the vulnerability of being a human creature, wholly dependent upon my Creator for any good thing.
The accounts in Acts show me that God is bigger and God is more powerful than anyone or anything of this world, even if He chooses not to take up the "fight" according to the world's rules of engagement. The Lord's ways are completely Other than human ways; and yet, He invites us to enter into His Life and to co-operate with His Will. To accept this invitation to radical discipleship, we must completely trust the Lord with our entire life; we must accept suffering; we must seek, find, and accept the Life that is ours in Jesus Christ by way of the Cross. And even that we can't do, unless we accept the Holy Spirit as the One "in whom we live and move and have our being.".
John
What stands out:
No matter how many times I read the Gospel of John, I am struck by the beauty and majesty of the opening profession of faith (John 1:1-18), "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God...". This prologue alone would be enough for me to meditate and feed upon for many a year. Everything in John's account meets me as awesomely profound and majestic, but at the very same time draws me to want and receive deeper intimacy with my Lord, Jesus Christ.
Challenges to discipleship:
The thing that strikes me about the Gospel of John is that over and over again in so many ways, the question is asked "who is Jesus" and we receive the answer, from Jesus Himself, or from witnesses: He is Lord, He is the Word, He is the Christ, He is God. However, with this most recent reading, I am noticing that every time Jesus tells us Who He is, we also learn something of who we are. If Jesus is the Word, I must be the one who hears (and obeys). If Jesus is the Light, I must be the one who sees (and acts). If Jesus is the Truth, I must assent to faith in Him. If Jesus is the Good Shepherd, I must follow Him with complete trust and dependence upon His provision and guidance. If Jesus is the Vine, I, as a branch, must bear fruit -- His fruit, not mine, not something I conjure up, but whatever He gives me to bear. If Jesus is the Messiah, the Lamb of God, I must find my life in Him, accept His salvation in the way He gives it, which is to die with Him and abide in Him through death and resurrection. If Jesus is my Creator and Lord, I must completely yield to Him, gratefully worshipping Him and yielding to His "finishing and perfecting" me in faith.
Personal Note
At the time I am writing this, I have received the devastating blow of losing my ministry-position at the place where I am employed. Due to the need for the institution to down-size, my role and my wages have been reduced to stipend-per-select-work, and no support for all the supporting work that makes the primary work do-able, at least in any excellent way. This is a catastrophic reduction in livelihood for me. I feel betrayed by the people of this organization. I am having a hard time discerning how the Lord wants me to respond. Does He want me here, to persevere in the face of chaos and apathy? Or is this a blatant call to go elsewhere? Does He want me to step away from everything and accept a completely new path? I'm trying to let the Holy Spirit speak to me through the reading of The Word and my reflection upon it. Even while I make the observations I have (above), I am not yet able to see how they practically apply to my life right now. My heart is in agony because I don't know how to proceed.
During the meditations on the Stations of the Cross, I find it easy to identify with the passages about "I look about me and there is no-one to lend me aid..."
The only thing I can perceive right now is that maybe the Lord doesn't want to allow anyone else to help me because He wants to be my Sole Friend and Savior in every detail. (Sole and Soul. Yes, I know.). I think this kind of thinking is potentially dangerous. I dare not assume I am the author or determiner of how God wants to care for me. God can use others or not. God can vary how He works. God is not bound by anything, except Himself; He is Love; everything He does is Love. I still believe completely in God, Who He Is, and that He Is With me. I just don't know any of the details right now. And that gives me anxiety.
Lord, Holy Spirit, please fill my heart with You. I don't even ask for any particular thing or feeling or perception or thought or direction; just fill me with You. Let "just" You be enough for me.
The Lord giveth; the Lord taketh away; blessed be the Name of the Lord.
Amen.
